Music City’s Last Pitch

By all indications, Saturday morning, James Franklin will meet with his football team at Vandy to tell them that he has accepted the job at Penn State as their new head coach.
Nashville is on a nervous breakdown alert.
Late Friday night, we learned at BJOTG.com that Nashville’s celebrities have come out en masse, to get Franklin to stay.
This is BREAKING NEWS folks.
Here is what they are offering.
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TIM AND FAITH

THEY HAVE OFFERED TO STOP SINGING.
AND TO GAIN WEIGHT.
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THE GHOST OF ANDREW JACKSON

FREE APPS AT BUFFALO WILD WINGS WITH ENTREE PURCHASE.
VALID ONLY AT THE HERMITAGE ONE.
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SHEA WEBER’S BEARD

FREE ICE SKATING LESSONS
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CHRIS JOHNSON’S DREADS

WOULD NOT DISCLOSE WHAT THEY OFFERED
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RON HOWES’ TOUPEE

WOULD ALSO NOT DISCLOSE WHAT THEY HAVE OFFERED BUT REPORTS ARE THEY WOULD LET FRANKLIN DO THE WEATHER IN ONE OF RON’S 44 VINTAGE TOUPEES.
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SNOWBIRD

HAS OFFERED ONE OF RUDY KALIS’ SWEATERS PLUS WILL PISS ON ANY VOLS FANS WHEN THEY POSE FOR A PIC WITH HIM.
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CROWN CHARLIE

FREE OIL CHANGE ON HIS GOLF CART
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OPRAH

HIS OWN SHOW ON THE OPRAH WINFREY NETWORK.
SHOWS COULD BE:

“6 SECONDS WITH JIMMY FRANK.” TWSS
“LET’S BE 1-0 THIS WEEK, HUH, YEH?”
“HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND PISS OFF EVERYONE.”
“FROM MARYLAND TO THE PROMISE LAND.”
“WHY KNOXVILLE SUCKS!”
“WHY CRYING AT EVERYTHING IS GOOD FOR YOU.”

 
@BIGJOEONTHEGO
 

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