If you don’t see them until it is too late, chances are you will utter a profanity. Maybe several because I do. It is my fault and it is your fault. The worst part is we know they are there and yet, we always forget.
The first time I saw the sign, it said Speed Cushion. Now for me when I think of cushion, I think of something nice and comfy and where I lay my head and all is perfect. A speed cushion, I have found out, is completely different. They are not comfy. Nor are they nice and I am sure they are needed, but I can still not like them.
There is a cut through road in Donelson by McGavock high school that we have used for more than 40 years that gets you out by Donelson plaza, instead of going down McGavock pike to Lebanon road and then out. It saves some time and was always no problem. Until one day.
This terrible day a sign goes up that says Speed Cushion and I rarely speed on said road. When you are not prepared for it, the words come out. See above. I would be okay with just one but there are five in this stretch. Again, I know why they are there and my problem is with this—-Just call it a speed bump. Plain and simple.
I am not sure who came up with the idea because it still has the same effect, no matter what you call it. We are using all kinds of different phrases these days to make things sound and feel better to us but my shocks’ feelings are the same and my rack and pinion. Also, that is the first time I have ever used rack and pinion in a sentence and now that I write this, I am not sure what that really means. I am too lazy to google so I will leave it in.
Another friend of mine in Bellevue says they have signs that say Speed Humps. Again, let’s stop and just say speed bumps. Yes, this probably sounds like the old man yelling at a cloud but just say it is a speed bump. What is the difference between handsome and gorgeous? I don’t know but I say this to myself every day in the mirror, “You are handsome and gorgeous.” Same effect, I think.
Yes, I am having fun with this as I sit at the red light I know have to go through because my cut-through is through with me.