“Watch Out For The Haters!”

The night before James Franklin knew he was going to leave Vandy for Penn State, he sat down and wrote a letter to whomever was going to follow him.  It stayed hidden in a desk drawer until a few days ago when new head coach Derek Mason found it.  We at BJOTG have obtained the first copy and it is vintage “Jimmy Frank.”
Dear Coach, 
I don’t know who you are but, you’re welcome.  When I took this job in Dec of 2010, the only people who wanted to come here were illegal’s and Regis.  No one wanted to be at the ‘coaching graveyard’ of Vandy.  I turned it around, and you’re welcome.  Again. 
Don’t worry about making that stupid V sign with your fingers.  Shit, half of the time, I was shooting a bird and the fan base that is supposed to be so damn smart, never even noticed it.  Go ahead and look at the pics, they never had a clue.  
Everyone is a damn know it all there, including this guy. 

Kevin Stallings.  This guy’s ass is hotter than Chernobyl.  How he has kept his job is beyond me.  By the way, he has about 3 scholarship players yet, he wants to tell me how to do my job.  Get yo goofy ass outta here. 
If you can, watch out for that dude Clay on the radio.  That SOB got me into more trouble when were speaking “off the damn record.’  I will never forgive him for getting my ass in dutch with the Track Suit after all of that.  Oh, you know who the track suit is…

Yeh, you call him Boss man, but eventually, you will call him TS, for track suit.  And, my brother, he wears that track suit all the time, I mean all the time and he thinks he is this. 

Get ready to hear Anchor Down so much, you will want to puke.  “Hey coach, Anchor Down!”  I heard that everywhere I went.  Here is a great way to piss them all off.  I was at some stupid university function, of course, the only black guy there, so I  grabbed the paper and announced, ‘I am going to the bathroom to Anchor Down.”  TS did not find that funny.
Do whatever, I mean whatever you can, to piss off any Vols football fan you can. Go above and beyond on this.  Subtweet those ‘tards all day long.  They are so dumb, they never know what you are talking about.  When a recruit, who tells you he likes Vandy but then goes to UT, send out a very cryptic tweet about how you only want winners and real men here. Then they will call you out on it but hey, Haters gonna hate so screw them. 
The crowd at home games. Man, listen.  One game against Kentucky, I looked up and thought I was at a damn Titans game.  There was no one there.  Maybe 10 thousand and 8 thousand came because they inherited the tickets from their dads when he died in 1945.  Put it this way, if they showed Matlock on that MF jumbotron during the game, they wouldn’t watch you run a damn play.  Go to their stupid parties, slap the hands, goose some asses and get out.  Hell, half of them thought I was Cortland Finnegan anyway.  
In closing, walk around like you own the place.  These people around here haven’t won in 100 years so they have NO clue what it is like and hell, after that second bowl game, I started pimp walking across campus, like huggy bear and no one said a word.  Here is a pic..

Good luck on your job my man.  I left a lot of talent for you, don’t screw it up.  My advice, beat UT another year, those rednecks will burn down Knoxville and you can write your ticket out there, just like I did.  Sorry you have to follow a legend like me, but hey, that’s life.

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