BIG JOE’s Super Bowl Bets

 

NASHVILLE-(BJOTG)

 

Super Bowl 48 is set to take place on Sunday and the Broncos are favored by 3 points, if you are into that sorta thing.  Apparently, a lot of you are into that sorta thing.  (Get your mind out of the damn gutter.)  

I am talking about betting.  For the SB, you can literally bet on any and everything.  Bets that have ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with the game.  Here are a few examples:

  • How long will it take to sing the National Anthem?

Over/under 2:25

  • Will the person who sings the National Anthem wear gloves?  
  • What kind of hat will Bruno Mars wear when he sings at halftime?
  • What will his first song be?
  • How many times will they show Archie Manning on TV?
  • How many times will they show Eli Manning on TV?
  • What will the color of Gatorade be that they dump on the winning coach?
  • When the SB MVP makes his speech after the game, who will he thank first?  God? His mom?  His teammates?  The city?

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You get what is going on here.  So we at BJOTG, have a few other bets for you that Vegas forgot.

  • How many tokes will it take for you to get stoned in Denver or Seattle?
  • How many times will FOX promote their terrible prime time lineup in the first half?
  • How many times will they compare Peyton’s neck to a giraffe’s ?
  • What time in the first quarter will you want to kill that girl at the party who WONT SHUT UP THE ENTIRE TIME?
  • How many times will said girl say during Bruno Mars halftime performance, ‘Oh my God, I love that song!”  
  • The over/under on how many times the ‘Know-it-all’ at your SB party tells you that Peyton never beat Florida while he played for Tennessee.
  • How many times will you say about Fox’s sideline reporter Pam Oliver, “What the F*k is wrong with her hair?”pamchewie
  • How many times will that damn girl at the party say, “I hate RIchard Sherman! He is just a thug who has killed hundreds!”
  • How many times will you go through a myriad of excuses for not going to work on Monday?
  • How many times will the Know-It-All at the party tell you about the time the Titans went to the Super Bowl and how he thought Dyson was in?
  • How many times will you think to yourself, ‘I hope the Titans make it back to the Super Bowl for the sole fact that I never have to hear about that team again?’

 

Enjoy the game my friends.

@BIGJOEONTHEGO

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